ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
