I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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