we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
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