In the future we'll all be gay
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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