Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize