well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
so much tequila, so little girl.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
