TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
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Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
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So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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