Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
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Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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