I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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