I think I am morally bankrupt
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize