You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize