I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Watching her eat just hurts me
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize