Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
