wrigley field is MILF paradise
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Randomize
