ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
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I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
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I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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