im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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