your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Randomize
