We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
