I swear she didn't look like that last week.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
