look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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