put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Randomize
