We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I think I died a long time ago.
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Dating After Heartbreak
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life