"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize