just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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