we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
