Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
