The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize