North Korea, Best Korea!
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
