No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
We are all done wearing pants today
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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