If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
