Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
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Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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