I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize
