Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet

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  (850): Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet http://tfl.nu/7t8x
  Replies (9) Good night (748) Bad night (2032)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.

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  (847): just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers. http://tfl.nu/run3
  Replies (19) Good night (6220) Bad night (1917)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.

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  (662): An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows. http://tfl.nu/wtg2
  Replies (19) Good night (1302) Bad night (3451)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.

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  (231): I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out. http://tfl.nu/21gu
  Replies (12) Good night (3835) Bad night (1222)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!

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  (832): apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?! http://tfl.nu/kaoo
  Replies (21) Good night (5666) Bad night (1326)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.

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  (609): I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun. http://tfl.nu/l7dj
  Replies (14) Good night (3693) Bad night (891)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.

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  (412): i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on. http://tfl.nu/zkya
  Replies (13) Good night (3992) Bad night (822)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  i dont even know how to be here

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  (973): i dont even know how to be here http://tfl.nu/mwy9
  Replies (34) Good night (5699) Bad night (1682)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.

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  (770): I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later. http://tfl.nu/dwy3
  Replies (34) Good night (938) Bad night (9627)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes

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  (360): I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes http://tfl.nu/v9u0
  Replies (13) Good night (6289) Bad night (1182)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.

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  (780): She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile. http://tfl.nu/gnnf
  Replies (12) Good night (6378) Bad night (1011)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.

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  (770): Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob. http://tfl.nu/4q4p
  Replies (9) Good night (1944) Bad night (1170)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?

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  (314): Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard? http://tfl.nu/d7iq
  Replies (5) Good night (1015) Bad night (593)
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  (805): View more from California

  It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs

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  (805): It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs http://tfl.nu/6q0t
  Replies (3) Good night (656) Bad night (301)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.

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  (616): You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder. http://tfl.nu/3c6d
  Replies (1) Good night (502) Bad night (169)

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