My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Randomize