Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Randomize
