i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
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