She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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