new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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