i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I seem to have left my pride at pride
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Randomize
