Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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