Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.

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(650): View more from California

one two three fourrrrnication!

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(704): View more from North Carolina

Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you definitely held a convo with a hobo

(1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

we have a secret handshake

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(910): View more from North Carolina

no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.

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(951): View more from California

now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.

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(404): View more from Georgia

dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere

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(307): View more from Wyoming

yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine

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(303): View more from Colorado

In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.

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