so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize