come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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