Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I have fence marks all over my body
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
