Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize