Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
