Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
you had me at cake vodka
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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