similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
