Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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