When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think my fart just growled at me.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
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My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
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Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????